I decided to hang out with B after my final yesterday since it would be a few hours until my girl’s night out to go see Frozen. He surprised me by bringing up the kids from our internship and they did a little Christmas jig for me. I felt bad keeping them out in the cold, so I asked their parents (who generously brought them over) to keep them warm and sent them off. After they left, B asked if we could hang out. I obliged, since I was brain-dead and I wanted a witness to my impending death.
We sat down at Peet’s downtown and discussed the finals in our classes, the internship we both took part in, and of course, plans for winter break. I didn’t really feel like saying much; I was tired and all I really wanted was to do was sit in a movie theater and witness the magic of Disney.
"So, where are you from?" he asked.
"Oh, I’m from Elk Grove originally, but I moved to Sacramento recently."
"When are you heading back?"
"Probably not for a while, to be honest. There’s hardly any space for me to to stay for long, anyway. Oh and I have work too."
"Aww, but don’t you miss your family at all?"
"Well…that’s kind of a long story." Trust me, buddy. You don’t want to know.
"Well, I got time." Ha ha, no you don’t.
"Thanks, but really, you don’t want to know." The answer just barely eked out of me on that one. “Believe me, I insist that talking about how damn cold it’s been will be far more interesting.”
"Okay, ha ha. This is some serious weather for like, hot soup and noodles, don’t you think?" Thanks for the change of topic.
"Foooooood." Nice, Clara. Now he’s going to think you’re a weirdo for that. What was that? Are you being a dyslexic cow again?
"Yes, fooooooood, ha ha. It’s pho weather. Or ramen weather. As long as it stays cold like this, noodles forever!" Wait, did he just mimic my cow-like food call?
"Noodles forever!!!!" Clara stop, you’re being a dumbass.
The conversation, fortunately, picked up the pace when we continued to talk about food and holidays and other things that were far more interesting than ourselves. The shared apprehension of graduation lingered over our heads for a time. Finally, before we parted, B had one more interesting thing to ask.
"So, did you finally learn how to moonwalk properly?"
"No, I still skid on the floor like a loser, ha ha. Sorry I’m such a poor student there."
"Nah, it’s all good. Take care, and Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas to you too, B."
Merry Christmas, indeed.
In all honesty, I don’t think any one of my friends have ever surprised me like that before. You know, showing up at the classroom of my final with children who sing Christmas songs and do silly dances. I normally hate surprises, but this was a nice one.
AH, Fairfield, CA
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To fight monsters, we created monsters of our own...
三十三間堂 通し矢 - IMG_3404 (von kento_o)
Red: the ink of angry pens
Black: the coffee in my glass
Red: my final starts at dawn
Black: i’m gonna fail this class
Not all toxic people are cruel and uncaring. Some of them love us dearly. Many of them have good intentions. Most are toxic to our being simply because their needs and way of existing in the world force us to compromise ourselves and our happiness. They aren’t inherently bad people, but they aren’t the right people for us. And as hard as it is, we have to let them go.
Life is hard enough without being around people who bring you down, and as much as you care, you can’t destroy yourself for the sake of someone else. You have to make your wellbeing a priority. Whether that means breaking up with someone you care about, loving a family member from a distance, letting go of a friend, or removing yourself from a situation that feels painful — you have every right to leave and create a safer space for yourself."
Simply one of the most amazing comics I’ve ever seen.